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Wanna Talk?

I went to a family gathering to celebrate the Fourth. The gathering was family and the host family's friends and neighbors. As a result, I felt a Mr. Darcy, disinclined to extend myself or get to know anyone beyond my own party.

We were there early because we brought supplies, so I decided to pass the time by reading some of my summer reading, a short book that I'm still trying to parse my feelings about. Maybe I'll write something about it later.

Anyway, despite my mixed feelings about the book, it was a straight forward enough read that I was motivated to read a lot of it. I passed a good portion of the evening reading, which hasn't happened much lately and it was nice to use the time in such a pleasurable way.

Sometime before the fireworks started, one of the older attendees interrupted my concentration to urge me away from the book. On one hand, this is a good piece of advice: if one is at a party, one ought to party. In fact, had he wanted to sit down and talk about what I was reading, I likely would have been happy to stop and engage with him (especially since the book was talking about was encouraging that sort of interaction with the texts one reads). I'm not blaming this man for not engaging with me. I could have pulled him into the discussion I was having internally and worked through my thoughts with him.

But his insistence on telling me to stop reading (three times) irked me. It's hard to say why, save the fact I felt unjustly ordered about by someone who doesn't understand me (and my introverted tendencies) or my motivations. If I hadn't had the book, I would have sat around, watching everyone quietly. I don't do very well with crowds, so I tend to retreat when there are too many people around. The book was a better use of time than sitting and staring, yet I know there's a cultural dislike of phone usage--and, apparently, that antipathy extends to analog devices, too--that means, apparently, whatever someone is doing in the midst of the public is, de facto, public.

This is good for me to remember, as I fall into the trap that phone or non-external interaction means a person isn't growing, thinking, or working.

Still, if you're going to interrupt, you should be willing to follow up with talking about what's on the person's mind.

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