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Feedback

I am part of a writers' group. We've been meeting, fairly regularly, for over nine years. The members have shifted, unsurprisingly, as friends have moved away. Three of the original members are still around, with one who joined really early in the process sticking around, too. We've rotated from an apartment close to the mutual workplace (back when we knew each other just because of the place where we worked) to another house to another then another, and continuing onward for the better part of a decade.

We've counted before: I think we've hit almost thirty novels, in one form or another. Some are complete; most are drafts that were abandoned via those aforementioned moves and/or lack of interest on the part of the writer. We meet Thursday nights for a couple of hours, using the group time as group therapy and forging friendships while also improving our writing. It's cathartic and enjoyable and one of the supports in my life that helps beat back my depression and gives me some non-work related adult interaction.

The hard part about it is the feedback--not so much what I get, as my friends are good at being positive and providing worthwhile comments, but instead what I deliver. As I've become a better (?) teacher, slowly improving how I teach my students, I've developed allergies to certain types of writing. There's a bit (read: way too much) of pride that comes in when one spends a lot of time studying something, and writing is something that I study. I write a lot--more now than at any other time of my life*--and I still read books, articles, and tweets about improving my craft, increasing my productivity, and enhancing my skills.

So when it comes to my group, I feel like I approach it from a place of expertise. And there actually is some there. I studied English in college, I teach writing on a couple of different levels. I know stuff. But the downside to that is I can't shake the feeling of...imposed superiority? That's not the right phrase, but the feeling is complicated. I don't mean to come off sounding as though I know better on any one thing, especially because all of the writers, to one level or another, has been involved in wordsmithing for a long time.

This makes the giving of feedback difficult. This is compounded by the fact that I have 40 or so papers that I have to grade, now that it's the end of the term. Whenever I have to grade that many papers, it bleeds into my group feedback, and I find myself being more terse and blunt--using my teacher voice, essentially--rather than being more supportive and diplomatic. I can get away with curtness to students, since they are learning how to write and don't know when to bend the rules. It's not the right approach for adults who know a great deal about writing.

So there's my confession. I love being a part of my group and I hope that the feedback I give them is appropriate and helpful. And I hope they don't think I'm a jerk.



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* I try not to think where my writing would be if I had improved my discipline, say, three years ago? How many double-digit views would my writing have if that were the case?

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