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End of the Story

I have exulted many times on this blog that I am finished with Writ in Blood. Every time I've kind of meant it. But it's stuck in me, like a hair that I've almost swallowed but haven't been able to get out of my mouth yet.

No more. I am officially done with all that I have to do this side of being picked up and published.

I can't really explain how I feel about this. I've commented a few times that this is the story that I felt had the best bet for publication (I no longer think that). I've also said that I wasn't as scared of/dreading as much the revisions of this book. Well, by the end, WiB was feeling just like everything else I had done. I was finished with it right around chapter 20.

But I pushed on, just like I'm supposed to. (If I can't act like a professional when I have very little time to write, then I can't really expect that I'll have the discipline to act like a pro when I do have the time. At least, so the theory goes.) It was rather unpleasant, on the whole. The advantage is that I'll be able to put editing behind me for then next long stretch, as I have a new book that I've been wanting to write since October 2012. So I'll be able to refill my reservoir of patience with the rewriting stage over the next few dozen months.

I don't know what I want to say in this post. It's really the end of the story. I have tried to document my feelings and successes as I wormed my way through the last three and a half years working on this book. It's been incomplete but honest, which is about all I can really expect of myself. I have learned a lot about my writing, what I am capable of, and what I can do when I really apply myself. I also learned that once I start editing, it's hard to switch back to normal writing mode. (For example, I just noticed how much I wrote "I have" and "myself" in this paragraph. I'd edit it, but I really don't want to.)

I suppose the last thing to consider is this: Will I ever return to this book? The simple answer: No. I have no plans of ever revisiting this behemoth (which, I happily note, is actually 286,957 words now. Somehow, I managed to shave off 24,000 words. Well, the somehow involved paring down sentence after sentence, dropping a number of interludes, chapters, and details. But that it actually worked is quite surprising.) though I certainly have possibilities of a sequel in mind.

But the complicated answer is, of course, more complicated. I would love to go through this book again, if it meant that I was working with an editor, agent, or both so that this could be a published experience for everyone. I think the book is still too big (250k would scare off a lot of publishers), but without expert outside opinion, I don't know what else to cut. And, as I've kind of intimated here, I'm not keen on dwelling on this book any longer. I want to move on. I need to move on.

Oh, and I should point out that I have achieved my goal of finishing the book before August. As a reward, I get to eat out with my wife--maybe see a movie, who knows?--and then take a day off to read. Like, whatever I want. That's my reward, aside from seeing an enormous job finished.

Yes, rewards are great. So is being justified in accepting them.

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